Sunday, August 23, 2015

How instagram ruined a friendship

It was the hashtag ‘cleaninginheels’ that did it. Before it there were the serious selfies, the duckfaces, the pouts and the poses angled just-so, to make sure the maximum shoe/ jewellery/ handbag and label label label was photographed. There had been plenty of eye rolls and furious scrolls past other ridiculous photos and captions, but this one took the cake. Cleaning in heels? Please shut up.

I love the odd selfie. I just love them when they’re at least slightly natural, when you can’t feel through your screen the 50 previous attempts to get the cheekbones chiselled just so, and you aren’t risking chiropractic bills for the awkward lean you’re attempting. I love the odd purchase-brag. Guilty, guilty, guilty. I love sharing, to an extent, and I love that feeling when you see someone else’s purchase and thinking I WANT IT AND I WANT IT NOW! When all of someone’s posts seem to be for the sake of showing how fabulous they want their life to look, it gets old pretty quickly. It’s so forced.

I’m well aware I’m being hypocritical, that this is high school behaviour (if that) and that this is unnecessary drama in my relatively drama-free life. What I think is a ridiculous post, others don’t think twice about. People want different outcomes from their social media posts, have different agendas, and that’s none of my business. I have the choice to unfollow, or to keep reading and watching, knowing I’m setting myself up for a reaction. But what if the person is a friend? Not a random fashion blogger that wouldn’t notice one follower drop from their thousands, but someone you used to see often enough, and someone who in real life always comments on your instagram posts (despite never liking them, I checked).

When you know the ins and outs of someone’s personal situation, as much as it’s possible to in this oversharing time, and the life they are currating on social media is a long, long way from the truth, what do you do? Do you go along with the cheerleading ‘you look so skinny!’ ‘I’m so jealous of your life!’ ‘your house is amazeballs!’ that is so common for friends and mere acquaintances? Do you call them out? Or do you do what I did, and just try and ignore it, to prevent your eyeballs popping out when you see yet another post aimed at generating said cheers?

The outcome for me was that they blocked me. Maybe for not commenting, maybe for ignoring. Well, I can only assume that’s the reason I was blocked, as we haven’t had an actual personal interaction in weeks. Nothing else has changed. I clearly wasn’t supporting the life she wants people to think she has, or maybe it’s because I know she doesn’t have it. Whatever the reason, it’s been a relief to not have to dread what I’ll see on her feeds. At least it’s sort of come to a head, and I can stop wasting so much time thinking about what to do. Insert motivational quote here. #blessed #winning #amazeballs





Thursday, August 20, 2015

The good old 'we should catch up'

Two things have made me even lazier than usual in my spare time. Firstly, my new job. It's a job that makes me think, a job that leaves me pretty exhausted most nights, a job that has shown me what being busy really means. Hint: I was never all that busy before.  
Secondly, a little puppy that is very, very time demanding. Pascal is the cutest, sweetest little thing, and when I'm not at work I want to be with him. Sometimes my husband must feel like a single parent, looking after this little devil, so of course when I'm home I want to be the one to bask in the naughtiness. 

Because I've been fairly MIA, when I see someone it's usually been a while. So of course come the 'we have to catch up!' conversations. Pascal is partly to blame for that. If you're anything like me, you want to sniff, cuddle and nibble on a new puppy. Probably the way most people do with actual babies. But unlike with Marcel, I've been a bit protective of this boy. I haven't really wanted to share him with many people. Selfish? Maybe. Perhaps it's getting older, but I just don't feel the need to have him seen by anyone. He gets enough fawning over when we walk out of our front door. His doggy ego is big enough! 

With the sniff in the air of spring, it's as though people are coming out of the woodwork, out of hibernation. I certainly am.

Let's face it, if we were going to catch up, we'd organise a catch up. It's not that hard. As you get older, your circle shrinks. And I'm more than OK with that. I just don't have the time or energy to dedicate to half arsed friendships any more. I want to spend my precious free time with the people I love. I want to do that properly. If you want to see me, come see me. You know where I live. If we're going to catch up, it shouldn't take three 'we have to catch up' conversations before it actually happens. We'd just catch up. 

Sunday, August 9, 2015

A dog friendly weekend in Kangaroo Vallley

Bank holiday is the universe's gift to financial services employees like me. Sure our industry can lack glamour at times, but we get a fake public holiday! Since I've been slaving over a hot keyboard for more hours than usual lately, I executviely decided that Mr C, Pascal and I were taking off for the weekend.
With a surfer husband our weekends away usually stay close to the coast, which is fine by me. I wanted something different for this winter getaway though, and an open fireplace was calling my name. It was a brilliant weekend weather wise, sadly almost too warm for the fire on Sunday! We still put it on (as in I sat drinking wine while Mr C engaged his firebug ways) and had to run around opening the windows it got so hot! 

We stayed at the gorgeous The Church, which is perfect for a couple and dog friendly. It's on the main road through town, so very close to the bakeries and pub, with a stunning outlook over the valley. The verandah was the perfect place to sit and watch the sun dip behind the mountain, then run inside to the roaring fireplace. 

Day trips to Milton, Mollymook and Berry meant we were never short of good eating supplies. A dog friendly visit to Yarrawa Winery, complete with two creek water infested Labradors meant we (I) were not short of beverages to drink whilst watching aforementioned sunset. 

A highlight was buying a pair of RM Williams Yearling boots. I've ummed and ahhed about buying a pair for ages, but bit the bullet as they're almost an essential for my job these days. I traipsed around the city all day Thursday and the were super comfy all day. If you had told me a year ago I'd be in the role I'm in today and wearing RM Williams I'd have  laughed in your face. But here I am! In my boots!

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